Case 033:Hole Picks

Gay life is not what it once was. Gone is the phantasmagoric deluge of in-person awards-ceremony-viewing house parties, raves, 12-step meetings,

Gay life is not what it once was. Gone is the phantasmagoric deluge of in-person awards-ceremony-viewing house parties, raves, 12-step meetings, midwifing seminars, dungeon balls, sex gatherings, consciousness-raising ceremonies, and poetry readings.

Case 032:Halloqween

It’s a rather unconventional October here at The InQueery research labs. At this stage of any other cycle solaris our cultural analytics team would

It’s a rather unconventional October here at The InQueery research labs. At this stage of any other cycle solaris our cultural analytics team would be poring over the sartorial tragedies of another summer party season, and ramping up for the pièce de résistance of bad behavior: All Hallows’ Eve.

Case 031:Nike Fag!

Do gays really walk faster than other human beings, or is that assumption based on myth and meme?

Do gays really walk faster than other human beings, or is that assumption based on myth and meme?

Case 030:Out in the Sun:
A Society Exposé

For the first summer in the history of time, the common rites of the saison have been suspended.

For the first summer in the history of time, the common rites of the saison have been suspended. The dungeon parties have gone so far underground we can’t even find them; your Sheryl Crow...

Case 029:Femme Fightales

The one-two bitch slap of missing both E3 in June and Comic Con in July has left The InQueery bereft with grief. Important research regarding the

The one-two bitch slap of missing both E3 in June and Comic Con in July has left The InQueery bereft with grief. Important research regarding the intersection of gaymer and cruising culture has been

Case 028: Buggin' Out

Here at The InQueery, we're still reeling from the forced suspension of all non-essential research. For one team running a toxicological

Here at The InQueery, we're still reeling from the forced suspension of all non-essential research. For one team running a toxicological investigation into the venom of Cinux theatrum, commonly known as the Theater Bug, the timing couldn’t have been worse.

Case 027: Pokgaymon Pride

To close out Pride month, the Games and Recreation Department at The InQueery has teamed up with Game Freak and Nintendo for another covert

To close out Pride month, the Games and Recreation Department at The InQueery has teamed up with Game Freak and Nintendo for another covert

Case 026: May Day, Gay Day

Spring has certainly sprung here at The InQueery’s hyper-sterile, now empty laboratories. And while queers nationwide were able to doze

Spring has certainly sprung here at The InQueery’shyper-sterile, now empty laboratories. And while queers nationwide were able to doze through Easter and Passover FaceTimes with the family, there’s no sleepwalking when it comes to the biggest gay day of awe: Beltane.

Case 025:Animal Crossing: New Queerizons

As the COVID-19 pandemic continues to enforce a home-based lifestyle The InQueery's Games and Recreation

As the COVID-19 pandemic continues to enforce a home-based lifestyle The InQueery's Games and Recreation Department has been hard at work analyzing what titles the queer video game community is flocking to.

Case 024:So Eggstra

Here at The InQueery offices, Easter is usually celebrated with all manner of pastel accoutrements. But since the CDC’s latest guidelines classified

Here at The InQueery, Easter is usually celebrated with all manner of pastel accoutrements. But since the CDC’s latest guidelines classified bonnets, baskets, and bunting

Case 023:Stay the Fuck Homo

While COVID-19 has held much of the population in lockdown, The InQueery has been fast at work collecting the accounts of gays from across the

While COVID-19 has held much of the population in lockdown, The InQueery has been fast at work collecting the accounts of gays from across the socioeconomic spectrum

Case 022:The Chain Gayng

With the arrival of a new decade, The Inqueery’s Codes and Communications division has been busier than ever deciphering the era’s nascent

With the arrival of a new decade, The Inqueery’s Codes and Communications division has been busier than ever deciphering the era’s nascent signifiers. In ages past, gays signalled their

Case 021:Oscars So Straight

This year’s Oscar nominations caused the usual uproar; once again the Academy’s pledge to acknowledge and reward more diverse contributions

This year’s Oscar nominations caused the usual uproar; once again the Academy’s pledge to acknowledge and reward more diverse contributions went unheeded. It’s been pointed out at length that #OscarsStillSoWhite and #OscarsStillSoMale, but what struck those of us at The InQueery was that, repeatedly, #OscarsSoStraight.

Case 020: Gay Team Sports:
A League of Our Own

In this age of reclaiming power, queers are on a roll. Once barred from serving in the military, now we can

In this age of reclaiming power, queers are on a roll. Once barred from serving in the military, now we can serve (and be drafted) in Trump’s army! Who could forget those dark days before we had

Case 019: "Chairs, Queers!"

From Isaac Newton under the apple tree, to Tom Cruise atop the couch, gays have never been able to just sit and putter according to the inert

From Isaac Newton under the apple tree, to Tom Cruise atop the couch, gays have never been able to just sit and putter according to the inert straight standard. In an expansive corrective effort, The InQueery

Case 018: The Creatures Who Queered Christmas Cinema

In celebration of the holiday season, The InQueery has surveyed queers in all 50 states (and Puerto Rico)

In celebration of the holiday season, The InQueery has surveyed queers in all 50 states (and Puerto Rico) on the Christmas movies they revisit year after year. Our team was stunned to discover

CASE 017: Shook

As queers across the country dry clean their green velvet blazers and polish their most tasteful adornments, 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘐𝘯𝘘𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘳𝘺 finds it an appropriate

As queers across the country dry clean their green velvet blazers and polish their most tasteful adornments, 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘐𝘯𝘘𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘳𝘺 finds it an appropriate time to release the results of a formal investigaytion into the

Case 016: Trim Job

Christmas season has arrived and The InQueery’s art and artifacts division has been in a bit of debate over one of the season’s most beloved

Christmas season has arrived and The InQueery’s art and artifacts division has been in a bit of debate over one of the season’s most beloved accessories: the Christmas ornament.

Case 015: The Gaybill Shoe Box

The InQueery’s Sciences department has delivered a staggering report on their study of gay and lesbian domestic artifacts. Among the vast

The InQueery’s Sciences department has delivered a staggering report on their study of gay and lesbian domestic artifacts. Among the vast cultural detritus sifted through, the most commonly-reported object held

Case 014: Our Gaily Bread

Conventional wisdom suggests the gayest bread may be no bread at all. At it’s foundation, though, bread is inherently queer.

Conventional wisdom suggests the gayest bread may be no bread at all. At it’s foundation, though, bread is inherently queer. The Spanish call it pan (an identity), the French call it pain (a way of life), and

Case 013: Pokgaymon Exclusive

It’s been a tumultuous year for queer Pokémon fans. In May, the LGBTQ RPG community was on the brink of rioting after the release of Detective Pikachu

It’s been a tumultuous year for queer Pokémon fans. In May, the LGBTQ RPG community was on the brink of rioting after the release of Detective Pikachu, the producers of which, in a spate of hetero-terrorism

Case 012: Last Minute Lookbook

Over the last 24 hours, The InQueery has received countless DMs from distraught readers desperately seeking help with costume ideas.

Over the last 24 hours, The InQueery has received countless DMs from distraught readers desperately seeking help with costume ideas. “I wear a goddamned leotard every day of the summer.” bemoaned David

Case 011: Kindred Spirits

Recently a reader wrote us with a burning question, “We’ve seen same sex urges writ large with vampires and witches, but where are all the gay

Recently a reader wrote us with a burning question, “We’ve seen same sex urges writ large with vampires and witches, but where are all the gay ghosts?” 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘐𝘯𝘘𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘳𝘺 immediately deployed a team of undercover investigaytors

Case 010: Frenchie Selfies

While compiling its quarterly report on spending and housing, The InQueery’s analytics team came upon a surprising trend among

While compiling its quarterly report on spending and housing, The InQueery’s analytics team came upon a surprising trend among gays of all socioeconomic backgrounds. It seems that in the annals of Instagram,

Case 009: Le Labo's Corn Maze

In collaboration with Le Labo, The InQueery is proud to introduce Corn Maze, its first perfume in a line of unisex seasonal fragrances.

In collaboration with Le Labo, The InQueery is proud to introduce Corn Maze, its first perfume in a line of unisex seasonal fragrances. Based on a childhood memory of “straying from [his] church youth-group

Case 008: Quear-rings

Thanks to social media and those pesky “identity politics,” it seems there’s no shortage of scenes, subsects and milieus for the American queer to

Thanks to social media and those pesky “identity politics,” it seems there’s no shortage of scenes, subsects and milieus for the American queer to cling to. But no matter which queen he stans, the type of sex party

Case 007: Gayzebos

Resident Historian of Aesthetic Foungaytions and Dwelling Design, Jenna Simon, has published her second book, Arcqueertecture:

Resident Historian of Aesthetic Foungaytions and Dwelling Design, Jenna Simon, has published her second book, Arcqueertecture: The Intersection of Art and Day to Gay Life, and we here at The InQueery couldn’t be

Case 006: The Canvas Code

When it comes to same-sex baggage, the canvas tote is the G.O.A.T. (Gayest of All Time). Its sheer ubiquity renders it invisible to the average

When it comes to same-sex baggage, the canvas tote is the G.O.A.T. (Gayest of All Time). Its sheer ubiquity renders it invisible to the average people-watcher, but the trained eye suspects there is more to this cloth

Case 005: Shooting Stars Come Out

After years of research carried out by The InQueery’s Queer Sciences Department, we can now confirm that shooting stars are, in fact, gay.

After years of research carried out by The InQueery’s Queer Sciences Department, we can now confirm that shooting stars are, in fact, gay. In a paper presented at this year’s Space Congress on Sex and Gender,

Case 004: Gayliens

Here at The InQueery we know every meme has a limited life cycle, so it’s unsurprising that the Facebook event titled “Storm Area 51, They Can’t

Here at The InQueery we know every meme has a limited life cycle, so it’s unsurprising that the Facebook event titled “Storm Area 51, They Can’t Stop Us All” has pretty much crashed and burned before making it to the

Case 003: Sweetqueens

The InQueery’s Sciences department has delivered a staggering report on their study of gay and lesbian domestic artifacts. Among the vast

The InQueery’s Sciences department has delivered a staggering report on their study of gay and lesbian domestic artifacts. Among the vast cultural detritus sifted through, the most

Case 002:The Iced Coffee Code

Here at The InQueery we always say, “Maybe you're born with it. Maybe it's a gay gene.” Thanks to our investment in a 10 year double-blind study

Here at The InQueery we always say, “Maybe you're born with it. Maybe it's a gay gene.” Thanks to our investment in a 10 year double-blind study, we can now conclude that the ability to wield an iced coffee is

Case 001: Aqueeriums

It’s a common misconception that queer children start dabbling in the dark art of interior design by sketching ideas for a themed

It’s a common misconception that queer children start dabbling in the dark art of interior design by sketching ideas for a themed bedroom or applying ancient Feng shui practices to their mother’s closet. “See?”